Thank You For The Life You Gave Us

Tonight rings in a new year, and many are out enjoying their nights with family and friends – looking to ring in the new year with smiles and laughter. Me, my wife and daughter, and our next door neighbors opted to go our and have an early dinner – sort of a small tradition for the past few years.

We shared stories of our holidays and laughed about things to come over good food. Well before midnight, we concluded our evening and are planning on ringing in this new year in a very low key way.

Sadly though, each new year’s eve a different type of anniversary is remembered for me. It is on this day 10 years ago that my mother passed away during what was supposed to be a routine surgery.

I remember I had just returned, with my wife, to California, where I was stationed in San Diego. That evening I received the call from my father informing me of my mother’s passing. A million questions raced through my mind – wondering why I had taken my father and mother at their words that she would be OK.

You see, I had flown home for 2 weeks on emergency leave during a time when my mother had become very ill. I arrived to my hometown, and my wife and I went to the hospital to find a woman who looked to be a shadow of my former mother.

We celebrated Christmas in her hospital room, muted and trying to keep high spirits. She had undergone one surgery already – to remove one of her legs where an infection had setup in one of her bones, poisoning her blood. But, because she was paralyzed from the waste down, no anesthesia was necessary.

We were assured she was recovering, but one last operation had to be performed before she could go on to a full recovery. The doctors warned us that her previous heart issues would make surgery risky, but they had no other choice.

I was told it was going to be routine, and urged to return to California – over 3000 miles away – by both mother and father… and how I wished I had been stubborn that one last time. How I wished I could be there and not so very far away.

You see my mother was a special woman. Oh we fought during my teenage years, but it was only as I became an adult that I truly saw her for what she was – no less than amazing.

Struck by a delivery truck at the age of 3, my mother was told she would not live past the age of 25, never go on to college, never get married, never have children; she was told to accept her meager life and try and endure until the end by the very people charged with her care.

She was defiant and believed in living life! She lived a full life of 50 years, 1 credit shy of a college degree. She married for 25 years, delivered and raised 2 children, ran her own small business with my father, was a gourmet cake chef, was elected to our local school board, and worked for many non-profits. She believed in travelling, even winning a trip to the Grammy’s where she met Eddie Vedder of Pearl Jam – among others. Nothing would hold her back.

She knew she lived on time that God had given her, and always selflessly gave that time to those around her. Even as an ungrateful teenager, who battled with his mother, she saw me through and helped me become the man I am today. While she was not perfect, she touched so many hearts so perfectly.

Mom, I wish you could have seen our daughter born, and I wish I could share all those things in my life you helped me see so many years after you left. Tonight as we count down to another year of life I want to say thank you for the life you gave to us.

Image of blue iris courtesy of: zteamie

Image of shadows courtesy of: Adam

Thank you, mom.